people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
