but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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