I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
