His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
