Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
