Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
