After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Houston, we have a blender
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
