Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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