I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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