So gin and wine won't be happening again
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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