I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
