I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
