I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
