she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
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