i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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