I love black thongs
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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