Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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