everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
