well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
