In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
