windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize