the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
