what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
When did angry sex become our thing?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
