Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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