I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
