i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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