He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize