the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
