none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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