It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
