Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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