Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
