Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
