I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Randomize
