What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I didn't notice because vodka
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
