Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
