i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
