If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Randomize
