Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize