I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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