I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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