plz talk dirty to me
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
