Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize