we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
