Having a random hookup so left but love u
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
