Duck Duck Cougar?
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I just found puke in my bra..
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
did i walk over a car last night?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
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