a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
