does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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