Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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