so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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